Guilt

I've finally experienced it: the guilt infertile women get when they feel like they're not allowed to complain about their pregnancy. A handful of friends who've dealt with infertility have expressed this while they themselves were pregnant, and I know that they'd say to me exactly what I've told them... that it's okay to complain when things get rough. We're not martyrs. I'd said something along those lines while we were still TTC, so I didn't truly understand what they were going through. But now I know, and I am humbled.

Because when you're in the midst of infertility, with all the pain and jealousy, honestly, it's a little infuriating to hear women complain about their pregnancies. How dare they complain? Don't they realize the awesomeness of what's happening within their bodies and that many would gladly sacrifice a body part to experience it? Yes, it's irrational. But it goes with the territory, and besides, as my DH has pointed out pretty much every other day since we've met, women are irrational anyway. Oddly enough, if I actually knew the pregnant woman in question, it didn't bother me at all to hear them complain. Only if it was someone I didn't know... usually on a message board, or someone I was just an acquaintance with IRL.

But when it comes down to it, no one likes to be hurting or uncomfortable in any way, even if you are a veteran of infertility and you finally get your dream of being pregnant. So I need to cut myself (and others) some slack. We definitely aren't martyrs to the cause, and I'm officially apologizing for wanting to maim unwitting complainers. It probably won't happen again. Probably. :)