April 10 - 16
I suppose it had to happen at some point this pregnancy: I completely and utterly freaked out over something stupid. And it was the works... anger, shame, tears (which usually come with anger) and jumbled thoughts. Mostly anger though. DH, although he was the instigator, handled it pretty well once my long fuse ran out.
One day, he sits down and starts talking about the prices of the furniture I want and the cost to go get said furniture. It comes from Ikea, so it will involve a trip to Minneapolis since Ikea doesn't ship stuff cheaply. So yes, it's inconvenient, but still cheaper and they're exactly my style... something that almost anything we'd find here won't be. Anyway, the point is, he was making it sound as though I WASN'T getting the furniture from Ikea, and that I'd have to find used stuff from garage sales or borrow from people (from who, I don't know, as everyone who has a crib is actually still using it). Basically giving me a Dave Ramsey lecture. Before I go further, I have to state that I don't have problems with used furniture as long as it's in decent condition. But I had a HUGE problem with it when it started to involve the nursery because not only did I spend lots of time thinking of how I wanted it to look, I found cheap solutions for the furniture and it wouldn't involve me settling for something just because it's cheaper or more convenient to get. So in my eyes, it's a win-win situation, and it upset me to have that taken away just because he didn't want to travel to go get it. (We would still be in the area BTW... we'd made plans to stay with friends living 75 miles outside the Cities, and even if we weren't going to Ikea, we'd still go visit our friends. This added to my frustration).
Anyway, I won't go into much more detail, but my blow-up actually happened the day after. Yeah, I stewed about it overnight and into the early evening the next day. Then when he got home from work, he mentioned it again, apparently not noticing my surliness on the subject, and BAM! Crazy hormonal pregnant woman on a rampage. It was kind of more than just the furniture, too... Dave Ramsey had a pretty big part to play, as I go through periods of extreme stress and frustration over the program, and it just so happened that DH picked one of those times to bring this stuff up. Nothing like feeling poor & destitute when you do have money in the bank and takes an Act of Congress to be able to spend any of it.
After I settled down, we talked it through, and after price checking stuff in town and the internet, he came to the realization that I was right (of course I am) and we will be making the trip to Ikea in May as planned. And just to make sure, I had to tell him that I didn't want him to think I was crying to get my way, and that I cry when I'm angry. He's seen in happen before and I've explained it before, but I just wanted to make sure he remembered that. He did. So I feel secure in the knowledge that he didn't give in because I was crying, which would have made me feel like a shitty person if he did, because I am not that kind of woman.
See? Stupid. The baby won't care what the crib looks like, what color it is or where it comes from. And in the grand scheme of things, there are soooo many other important things to worry about, that afterward, I feel silly for being so upset about something that's just cosmetic. But I'm still right. ;)
Oh yeah... baby update. It's back to kicking my bladder constantly. Brat. And I'm mostly out of regular clothes now and into maternity stuff. On the weekend, some girlfriends and I went to Fargo to do some shopping, and I needed some nursing bras, so a stop to the maternity store in the mall was on the schedule. Yeah, my nursing bra size is a 34DD! That shocked the crap outta me because my boobs really haven't grown all that much. It was explained to me that regular bras and nursing bras have different sizing standards, so that made me feel a little less top heavy, but still. That's a set of letters I NEVER thought I'd attain. Also while we were there, the girls were pulling clothes for me to try on, so I spent a fair amount of time in the dressing room. In the end, I bought 2 nursing bras, 2 night bras, khaki shorts, gray cargo pants and a black skirt. Although there were a few other things I would have liked to buy, my budget didn't allow it (see Dave Ramsey mention above), so I just got some basic pieces that won't go out of style and that are versatile. That's how 95% of my normal wardrobe is anyway, so why change that now?
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