Cycle #27

Yep.

Although last cycle was NOT cool. I thought I was pregnant because I developed the urge to eat everything in sight, even though I had stuffed myself only a hour before. This lasted a few days. So since this was something new, I of course jumped to the conclusion that something finally worked and that there'd be a baby coming mid June 2012. Not so. I started spotting at 11DPO, per the norm, and 5 days later, AF.

There is something so devastating about thinking you're pregnant, instead of just hoping you are, only to find out you were wrong. After you've thought about how & when you'll tell friends and family, beginning a name list, nurseries and most heartbreakingly, after you've imagined cradling that sweet little lump in your arms once it's been born.

And that's the exact reason why I'm so pessimistic about the outcome of my cycles. I LOVE thinking about all those things, but I've learned I shouldn't think about them in the LP. Which sucks because they make me so happy. But it's a small sacrifice for not being inconsolable when the inevitable BFN shows up.